blog saves the day!

blogging the bailout

with 5 comments

I’m back, bitches! And blogging the financial crisis. That’s right: I’ve learned everything there is to know about the American economy in the past two weeks, and I’m ready to share my half-baked insights and advice with the 2-3 readers who occasionally check in on my blog. (What would Teresa say?)

Today two big things happened: 1) Congress failed to come to an agreement on how best to deal with total economic chaos, while at the very same time, 2) Washington Mutual was seized by the government in what was the largest bank failure in U.S. history.

So, then. My half-baked advice of the day: FREAK OUT! Starting tomorrow I will be rushing to various ATM machines around the city and withdrawing the remaining cash in my account so I can store it in the freezer for the next 4 to 5 years. In 2012 I should have a very cold $443.78 waiting for me. What will you fools have? Not a pot to piss in. I probably won’t have one either. I tend not to use pots, not to mention jars or urns. Bushes, corners, other people’s beds, on the other hand….I’m just saying, it’s a good thing I’ve been saving milk bottles for the past year. Just in case they come in handy when the banks collapse and our financial infustructure infrastructure goes kaput. Piggy bottles!

Tune in tomorrow, by which point I hope that inspiration will rouse me to blog another useless post. With recipes for theme drinks you can serve at your debate parties. Tri-color shots, y’all. Gross, but patriotic: for America, but also France, Italy, and Russia.


Written by rarface

September 25, 2008 at 11:30 am

Posted in politics

Tagged with ,

5 Responses

Subscribe to comments with RSS.

  1. your blog has really taken a political/economical turn.

    i think this weekend you should get drunk and write about that on Monday. I mean as long as the economy is in the toilet, you might as well have your head in one as well.


    September 26, 2008 at 2:41 pm

  2. PS-the time on your blog is all crunked. it is now 10:41 am EST and it says I commented at 2:41pm. wtf


    September 26, 2008 at 2:42 pm

  3. Dude, it’s hard to blog about getting drunk when you only ever drink by yourself…

    Not to worry though. I’m going to a library book fair tonight – I’ll be sure to blog about that over the weekend!!


    September 26, 2008 at 4:22 pm

  4. It should be even easier to blog about being drunk if you only drink by yourself – no one to alienate as you mis-type infustructure! (Actual spelling: infrastructure)


    September 26, 2008 at 8:53 pm

  5. You’re going to a library book fair? You and Nikil sure know how to party….. Grant is going to be dying to go visit with weekend plans like that….

    In need of $700,000,000,000

    September 26, 2008 at 10:05 pm

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: